Exploring lands,
faster than ever before,
Having the cures to save more lives,
connected to everyone, everywhere by a simple box with letters,
no flying cars yet but the future is promising.
The world will never be perfect,
humans are naturally flawed.
Living amongst the seven sins, mankind has still managed to flourish.
2012, myth or a mystical land?
Cherish the kindness of strangers in a changing world,
where we know more than anyone ever did before us.
A crowded room,
familiar faces that I have seen from birth.
Family, related only by blood.
I know them by their titles,
amma, aunty, uncle,
sister and brother who are really just cousins.
Chitter chatter among the aroma of cutlets and samosas.
If I pay attention I can hear the news,
or rathar the gossip of who is getting married to whom.
I smile blankly,
and as they smile back judgment fills their minds.
I don’t care to make small talk,
I don’t wish to know about her newest car,
or how much that house down the road costs.
A crowded room,
familiar faces,
warm bodies.
Yet,
I’m cold
and more alone than ever.
You can worry,
let your hands shake as your knees tremble.
The goosebumps build up on your back.
The need to figure it out,
always.
Why is it happening? And all so fast.
Too fast to be controlled.
Where there is a high there will always be a low.
This realization brings on the anxiety.
Be worried, be nervous.
But never let those feelings control you!
It’s not worth it if the fear of losing it doesn’t make you wonder,
doesn’t make your stomach flip,
doesn’t make your lips tremble with the thought of ‘what if?’.
Hold on,
capture it in your mind and soul.
This is it,
right now it’s happening.
Eat it up and enjoy it.
Because THIS is it.
The pain,
the anguish,
the indescribable hurt.
A lonliness like no other,
left alone,
in the dark,
pretty lost.
No one to talk to,
no one to cry on.
Days of red eyes and bad hair,
a sniffy nose and crinkled pjs.
Scenarios won’t stop playing,
over and over again.
Is it really worth all this intolerable pain?
The good times flood through the eyes,
the arguments and fights don’t seem so bad.
It’s better to have loved and lost,
loved and lost,
lost.
“Alright, I’ll talk to you later sweetie.”
As he pressed the end button on his cell phone, Jenin sighed. Her face was beginning to fade. Her voice was all he had, but with the time difference he was only able to hold on to that for about 5 minutes a day. He knew he loved her, he always had since they used to push each other on the swings. He’d never let go, even when she told him she was ok, she could swing by herself. He was afraid she’d fall. Seeing her hurt was unbearable. Every time he heard her sleepy voice during their usual phone calls, Jenin always pictured her as she was then – short with long, dark pigtails, wearing a red and white polka dot sundress as she ran towards the swings giggling in her high pitched voice. It always made him wonder if he was in love with the past more than the present, with what they had rathar than what they have now.
Jenin couldn’t bring himself to think about it in too much depth, he knew that could be dangerous. The loneliness of a long distance relationship was difficult as it was, causing him to think and act in ways that he never thought possible.
Somehow the distance made him feel like a different man. Only during those five minutes was he really her boyfriend. The rest of the time he was free to be whoever he wanted to be. Thoughts crossed his mind, that perhaps his girlfriend was having a similar experience. But it was always easier to shove that away until it had to be dealt with. For now, it was the here and now that Jenin cared about. Yes, he admitted it was selfish to himself daily but the simplicity of such a lifestyle preceded all other options.
And when people asked, he would just say ‘It’s complicated’, because nobody really wants to sit there and listen to a complicated love story.
It was his little secret, that in reality he made it more complicated than it had to be.
Silly,
dancing to my own tunes,
singing along in various voices.
There’s a party in my soul.
Happiness pumps through my blood,
everything is bright,
the sky can not be any bluer.
Smile, laugh, hug ecstatically!
I don’t wanna stop, I don’t want to pinch myself.
This is real, why shouldn’t be?
Spread the happiness,
with division love can flourish,
kindness should never be underestimated.
I want more days,
I want more moonlit nights,
share it all with others,
share the happiness which is invaluable wealth.
new beginning,
doors open as windows shut,
embrace the opportunity.
I’d rathar be here than anywhere else,
content with what life has thrown my way.
A breath of fresh air,
a reminder of what’s been missing,
to live,
to breathe,
to experience and share.
To want no more,
continue to believe in the goodness of world.
Another adventure awaits,
life awaits.
The people you are yet to meet,
memories waiting to be created,
places to be discovered.
If not now, then when?
Time ticks,
no moment is worth wasting.
Soak in the present,
the gift that is now.
Be anxious,
be happy,
life awaits.
it happened for a reason,
the reason is yet to be discovered.
the usual hangout filled with random faces,
2 strangers shake hands, share drinks, introductions.
her last night out in the city,
her heart is already bleeding knowing all that she is already leaving behind.
his second time in the city,
still learning the names of streets and pubs.
a random encounter, just like the hundreds of times before.
flutter flies signal, this is different.
shy smiles exchanged in the silence during small talk.
the usual questions -
where are you from? what are you doing? how much can you drink?
innocent flirtations while gulping glasses of beer.
hopping from bar to bar,
time depletes as asses shake to the music of the night.
the sun rises as goodbyes are mumbled through a warm hug.
he finds his way home knowing he’ll never see her again.
she tries to find the answer to why this had to happen now.
exploding chemistry can not be deciphered.
From one heartbreak to another.
It seems like the only way to cope;
to have a new man comfort the war wounds of the broken relationship left behind.
The old man is scum, a love killer who has done the unthinkable – got up and left.
The new man is the saving grace, flying in to a perfect rescue.
No time to measure the new, he’s already making stars appear while fresh desire rises to the head.
But sooner or later, the adrenaline halts.
It’s a like a bad habit that’s difficult to kick.
You can’t patch up a scar with half a band-aid.
The new and the old begin to mesh; hope is lost, love is cursed.
Yet it wasn’t their fault at all.
